I had a look. Tell me this, why do these guys always claim to be ex-CIA or special ops? Nah, I think I can guess.

http://cyberpaths.blogspot.com

http://www.dontdatehimgirl.com or clearblogs.com/theexposer

I will never never date again. Ever. Please make the therapists who blather out platitudes to me stop. They obviously do not understand pathologicals.

I enjoyed reading your scenarios very much. (Talking about synchronicity) I just happened to have been responding to the author of indeterminacy.blogspot.com when I read your comment and it struck me again how succinctly you’re able to capture something about human beans.

But let me add since I’m asking for indulgence and taking up more space, nothing I wrote is about more than observed tendencies. I believe we are fated only if we drift.

We all say we’re not going to be like our parents, yet we find ourselves doing and saying the things they did in similar situations. People don’t marry their parents. They marry someone that makes the communication style that they learned from their family functional.

“Little girl lost” had a mother who was were traditionally feminine, and she attracts and is attracted to traditional (macho) males even if she hates the idea of such domination. This is because her communication behaviors are enabling of that style, which in turn enables her own. Thus the spontaneity of their romance is enabled. Of course, when the thrill is gone, they wake up and say, “Who the hell are you? Where’s the person I knew and loved?

“Little boy lost” is the male whose mother was the dominant partner and the father was laid back and had already assimilated from his father the message that there was no use initiating anything because it wouldn’t be satisfactory. So the grandson, most comfortable waiting for the other to initiate and make decisions, will end up witn a dominant female partner, resent the dominance he invites, and echo the sentiment of his sires: “Women! Can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em.”

Family dynamics vary. A daddy’s girl’s communication style may reciprocate her father’s behaviors rather than imitate the mother’s competitive behaviors, and the same with a momma’s boy. Assimilation involves both symmetry (same, imitative) and complementary (opposite, completing). And while family dynamics vary,

Everyone involved in courtship should take a hard look at the other’s family–and an equally cold-blooded look at their own, and what kind of person their own communication would attract or repel. Unfortunately, we don’t set out to learn communication to do things. We learn by participating in whatever there is where we are. And that can get very weird sometimes.